For Laura and Javiar
Hillary and Lauren

Charles Feildelson Jr., Yale professor, said that “Life is a series of little deaths out of which life always returns.” Most of us, at least by midlife, have discerned the truth about this affirmation. Life is comprised of loses, some gut wrenching and perhaps others more benign, but with each transition or death something new is brought forth. We all know the adage “when one door closes another opens”. However, in the midst of transition, we often feel like we are trapped in a doorless and windowless room, dark, alone and hopeless.

“Isolation is the enemy of survival.” Laura Day

According to Cancer Prevention Research published in Oct. 2009, it was reported that “scientists studying mice have strong evidence that social isolation accelerates cancer development. These mice were genetically engineered to be susceptible to breast tumors. Those that were separated from their mothers developed tumors earlier than those that were not isolated. Stress hormones seem to have changed the activity of genes in the tumor cells.”

I once heard Marianne Williamson say that “It really doesn’t matter if you are ready or not, because God is always ready.” Many of us are waiting to show up and really participate in life. Like the famous adage goes, this isn’t a dress rehearsal, this is the play!

Because most of us like to think of ourselves as nice, thoughtful and kind, saying no may be something that can be difficult for us. We all seek behavior that is consistent with our self concept. If we think that saying no makes us unloving and unaccommodating, therefore in conflict with our valued self image, we will struggle with saying no.

Spiritual teachers these days seem to be emphasizing in unison the power of the present. To many of us, this emphasis on the present may feel mundane. Isn’t it more dramatic and intense to focus on the past and more exciting and promising to focus on the future? However, inherent in this present moment lays a quiet, simple, joyful, peace.